Three Clowns; Night Discussion on the Palace of Gigantic Masculinity 2 --- Part 2

Xie Lian still picked the spot next to the window, and after they’d settled, Nan Feng spoke up. “Why do we have to come here to discuss things? You sure there won’t be people listening in?”

Xie Lian replied warmly, “It’s fine. Even if other people hear us, they won’t care, they’ll only think we’re insane.”


“In order to avoid the three of us continuing to waste each other’s time like this, let’s lay it out,” Xie Lian said. “Now that we’ve calmed down for a night, have you guys thought of any ideas?”

Fu Yao’s eyes flashed, and he said coldly, “Kill it!” “No shit!” Nan Feng said.

“Nan Feng, don’t be so rude. Fu Yao didn’t say anything wrong,” Xie Lian said. “The way to solve this problem is to kill the creature, but the problem is, where do we go? What are we killing? How do we kill it? I suggest…”

Right then, the sound of gongs and drums came from the main street, and  the  three  looked  out  the window.

It was that procession of “delivering family” again, looking bleak and tragic. This party of men and horses blew their instruments to the utmost, hollering and cheering as if they were afraid people couldn’t hear what they were about.

Nan Feng frowned. “Didn’t they say the people around Mount Yujun don’t dare to make a big show of these ceremonies anymore?”

This procession consisted of large, strong, and buff men, their expressions and muscles both taut, and cold sweat oozed from their forehead, like they weren’t carrying a festive and cheery bridal sedan, but a guillotine that’d end their lives early. It made one wonder just what kind of person was seated in that sedan.

After humming for a moment, just as Xie Lian was thinking of going to check things out, a sinister wind blew by, raising one of the curtains on the side walls of the sedan.

The figure within the sedan behind the curtain was lying in a really odd position within the sedan. Her head was bent in an awkward angle, and beneath the bridal veil revealed bright red lips, the smile of which was overly exaggerated. The sedan tipped and the covering fell, exposing a pair of bulged eyes staring their way.

From the looks of it, this was clearly a woman who had her neck wrung, and was laughing uproariously at them soundlessly.

Perhaps it was because the sedan carriers were shaking too hard, but that bridal sedan wasn’t steady in the least, so that woman’s head bounced along with the bumps. They bumped and bumped, and THUD!, a head fell off and rolled onto the street.

And the headless body sitting inside the sedan also fell forward — BANG! the entire person crashed out of the sedan.

One of the sedan carriers wasn’t paying attention and stepped onto  an  arm.  He  screamed  without thinking, then instantly the entire wedding procession exploded. Good going! A band of people came out of nowhere, whipped out their shining broadswords, and yelled. 


It was a huge commotion on the streets. When Xie Lian looked closely, that b ody with its head severed wasn’t actually a real person, but a wooden puppet.

“Too ugly!” Fu Yao commented again.

The Tea Master just happened to be bringing the copper teapot over. Xie Lian recalled his attitude yesterday, so he asked, “Owner, I saw that group of people banging drums and gongs yesterday, so wh at’s that they’re doing today?”

“Seeking their own ruin,” the Tea Master replied.

“Hahaha…” Xie Lian wasn’t surprised. “Are they trying to lure out t hat Ghost Groom?”

“What else do you think?” the Tea Master replied. “The dad of a missing bride is awarding a great sum of money to find his daughter and capture that Ghost Groom, so that  group  has  been  billowing  smoke around, all day every day.”

Fu Yao commented disgustedly, “If I was the Ghost Groom, I’d wipe out this entire troupe for sending such an ugly thing to me.”

“Fu Yao, you’re not speaking as an Immortal should,” Xie Lian said. “And, can you change that eye-rolling habit of yours? Why don’t you set a small target for yourself first, and roll only five times  a  day  or something like that?”

“Set fifty times a day and it won’t be enough!” Nan Feng said.

Just then, a little youth suddenly poked out from the procession; spunky and spirited, he was the leader, judging by sight. He raised his  arm  and  hollered,  “LISTEN  TO  ME,  LISTEN  TO  ME!  It’s  completely useless if we keep this up! How many times have we made this trip now in these past few days? Has the Ghost Groom ever shown itself??”

The group of big men agreed and started to grumble, and that little youth said, “I think, since we started this, we should just do it, and charge right into Mount Yujun. We’ll search the mountain and drag that ugly freak out to kill! I’ll lead the way. Any good, brave men can follow me, kill the ugly freak, and we’ll split the reward money!”

There were only a small and scattered number of men at first who answered his call, but the  voices gradually grew bigger and bigger. At the end, everyone was  roaring  in  agreement,  actually  sounding rather great in strength.

Xie Lian wondered, “Ugly freak? Owner, what’s with the ugly freak they’re talking about?”